Lemme just scale everything out for you right now because I’m feeling a little bit of an existential crisis coming on right now. We live, (or at least I’m assuming those of you reading this blog do), in Cambridge (112 km2), a city in Ontario; Ontario (1.076 million km2), a province in Canada; Canada (9.986 million km2), a Country in North America; North America (24.71 million km2), one of the five continue on the entire planet of Earth. 148.4 MILLION SQUARE KILOMETERS. And that’s just land area, I’m excluding ocean area which would make it approximately 510.1 million km2. “Good for you Bayley, you’ve told us she’s a big world out there”, hold on my sarcastic friends because I’m not done yet. As a matter of fact I’m kind of encouraged by the scale of the planet, no problems there. In fact I love it, but I’ll get into that later. So yeah, “big world”, but do you know what I mean when I say the word “lightyear”. Because beyond this town that encompasses 0.00000022% of this big ol’ world, and beyond Earth itself, there’s a hell of a lot of steps you can keep taking back for a broader perspective. A lightyear is the distance that the speed of light travels in a year, a measurement. Now for those of you who have already had science class I’m sure you already know the speed of light in a vacuum as you’ve probably had to repeat it in your head a few times for the sake of a science test but I’ll just recap for you. 3 X 108 metres per second. Now it doesn’t take a genius to tell you that that’s fast as all hell but just for some perspective, the earth has a circumference of 42,000 km. Let’s say your mom bought you some fly new kicks and when you put ‘em on you’re not only feelin’ sexy as hell but you’re feelin’ fast. As fast as the speed of light in fact so you decide to take ‘em for a test run, in just one minute you would have run around the entire planet! Crazy! Around the entire planet faster than it would take you to finish making a hot pocket? No. actually that was a total lie, you’d have traveled 7.5 times that (that’s right 7.5 times around the planet) before you even finished the thought of making a hot pocket. One second. We need to take that kind of speed and use the distance it would travel in a year to better translate the distance of things in space. Oh yeah, we’re talkin’ space talk people. But even with light years (9.5 trillion km) it becomes difficult to measure things within the further depths of our universe. We live in an infinite and ever-growing universe. Just for a second try to grasp that concept… Infinity. I personally find it hard to visualize the sheer size of earth in my head, let alone infinity. So let’s compare our previously established “big ol’ world” to the universe now shall we? 510.1 million km2…. Infinity (some synonyms by the way being endlessness, boundlessness, and limitlessness. Just for the record). Not so much of a “big ol’ world” anymore now is it? So with all that said, what does that say about humanity? The deepest and possibly the most compelling question in all of humankind has been “What is the meaning of life?”. Humanity has always wanted, almost needed, to have a reason to exist and to matter somehow in the grand scheme of things. For everything that is happening around us and everything we do to be relevant in some way shape or form. Humanity’s answer to this for as long as we’ve been on this planet has been in religion, in worshiping and living in the way some higher power that has created us intended. Be that God, some Greek deity like Zeus, or some cultist spaghetti God. I personally don’t believe in anything like that and I’m not saying I am right or anyone else that does believe in these religions is wrong, if I were to place my bets on which was right though I’d definitely go with the spaghetti God. Quite honestly I don’t blame those that choose to believe in these religions. When it comes to the rituals and traditions played out by religious followers, they can seem so ridiculous, time-consuming, and redundant when viewed without the lens that is some religion or scripture. But in the mentality of holy man, these seemingly trivial tasks bear a heavy weight to them. For example, blessing your meals before you eat. At face value it’s just a bunch of people saying thank you a lot around a dinner table and cruely postponing digging into the delicious meal right under their noses. But just read this post by a religious newspaper describing all the depth and meaning behind it. Taking this a step further let’s look at the entire idea of sin itself, everything you do in life is now kept under constant surveillance by this omnipotent being, and when you live life in ways opposed to God’s teachings in what is “good”, you are a sinner. And it is hell, eternal damnation, that sinners go to in the afterlife as punishment for the way that they lived their lives. Those that had lived their lives right in the eyes of God go to heaven, this utopia where your soul is just mossin’ and livin’ it up for the rest of eternity. Sounds pretty good right? Exactly. Right there is a reason to live a “good” life, a motivation to pursue a righteous life and an afterlife that isn’t down below sharpening pencils with a school sharpener (tbt), a reason to do all of these seemingly pointless rituals. Because in the end it’s all to reach that end goal of a utopian afterlife with your God. A purpose and a higher calling. Of course I have my gripes with religions too that I’ve been restraining myself from getting into but I think that’d actually make a pretty good blog for the future so I’ll hold onto it. So let’s remove the idea of God’s and supernatural entities creating us and heaven and hell and all that fun stuff and entertain the idea that our existence really is as arbitrary as science says it is. It’s kind of comical really how insignificant we are in the big picture of the universe, if the earth were to be plowed over by an asteroid right now and completely destroyed it's safe to say that the universe really wouldn’t give a single damn. It’d be about as momentous an occasion as a single drop of rain falling into the ocean. So it can be very strongly argued that none of anything that we have done, are doing, or ever will do matters whatsoever. It’s not like we have some higher power watching over us with a chalkboard tallying the goods and bads we’ve done. So if I were to turn to my right in the middle of class and shoot Daniel right in the head, could it really be considered bad? Yeah, maybe it’ll matter to Daniel just a little but what does that matter? In an infinite universe everything we do is beyond microscopic, our only real ability to interact with the universe is being able to observe it. This minuteness and irrelevance really calls into question morality as we know it. Why care. You wanna cuss out your teacher? Cuss out your teacher. Because in the end we’re all gonna die, the sun's going to explode like all stars eventually do, earth is going to be destroyed, and absolutely none of it is going to matter. Not humanity, not the technological or medical advances made, and certainly not you getting in trouble for cussing your teaching out... I know right? People don’t call me the life of the party for no reason. Now everything I said was true, technically. But I know after reading this you aren’t going to feel motivated to drop your laptop, rob a bank, go seal clubbing, and start punting babies. Why is that? Now your answer was probably something along the lines of “BECAUSE THAT’S F&@KED YOU LUNATIC”. Congrats you answered right, the point of what I just said wasn’t a justification to do wrong, it was to just to kind of broaden your perspective in a sense on a variety of things and make you really think from a different place. A slightly darker and more depressing place I’ll admit but a different place nonetheless. And regarding everything I was saying about the Earth in comparison to the Universe. Yes, it is really damn small in that regard but the intro to this blog had a purpose. Everything is small in comparison to infinity, that doesn’t make the meaning we can personally take from every experience Earth has to offer any smaller. Hearing about how small the area I’ve spent nearly the entirety of my life in relevance to everything else that there is left to experience that I can experience, excites me and motivates me to get myself to a place financially where I have the ability to explore and see as much of it as possible. I don’t really care in all honesty if in the long run none of it matters, ‘cuz it’s really all what you can personally take out of everything you do that’s important. Merry Christmas and a happy existential crisis to you all.
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Gonna be honest with you guys… I’m just kinda lookin’ for some random thing that I can talk about quick for this blog. To be honest I can handle another one of those page and a half long projects so I’m just gonna make up something short and sweet that I’m not gonna be trying to justify my opinions on for paragraph after paragraph sooo…. Why do people still use wooden pencils???
I mean COME ON. Can you honestly tell me that there is any area that an ordinary wood pencil outshines the technical marvel that is the mechanical pencil? Listen, to all of you primitive wood pencil using cavemen. I don’t know where it is that you get off brandishing your obsolete murdered tree limbs but I’ve just about had it with you people. So lemme just fill you in on just a taste of the problems your little piece of equipment causes. To start, sharpening the damned things, I know that getting your own sharpener is probably an easy fix but I didn’t have one, and I had to use the class sharpener… Honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if that whole ordeal is one of the punishments in hell. I swear to GOD, every time I try and use that sharpener I SWEAR TO GOD, EVERYTIME. Only ONE side ends up sharpened. I’ll have a whole centimeter of lead exposed on one side and then just wood on the other! And I’ll flip it and turn it every which way trying to fix it but nothing, NOTHING, ever works. So then eventually you just give up right because apparently God or whatever powers that be are totally against you and you just have to say screw it. Now you’re just sitting there at your desk trying to peel back that wood that you can’t fit your nail under it because lucky you finally got around to cutting your nails the day beforehand because you let them grown out so long your hands are constantly clenched in a fist so that your friends don’t get the chance to start roasting you on your witch nails. BOOM, there’s over 10 minutes spent A. Trying to sharpen your pencil so you can just get back to your desk and use it and B. CLAWING away at your pencil trying to fix it while everyone else in the class used that time actually working. The end result (At least in my experience) being that the lead that was already so exposed that it ends up falling out when you try and start writing again and then you’re back at square one. Geez, screw just one of the punishments, that whole scenario could make up hell itself. Like this whole situation where you’re in a classroom or an office or something and you’ve been tasked with sharpening a case of pencils. But the only tool you have to sharpen them is one of the school pencil sharpeners and every time you get down to the last pencil when you return to the case it's all filled up again. And that is your life for the rest of eternity. Yeah screw that I’ll take the burning alive thanks, at least I won’t have to hop back on the fire every 5 minutes because for whatever damn reason only half of my body is burnt to a crisp. And I’m sure you’re reading this and saying “Oh Bayley just get another sharpener you idiot”. Well here’s my answer, HELL NO. I’d rather just get a pencil that get’s rid of the whole ordeal entirely, just because it’d be easier with a pencil sharpener doesn’t mean the problem is solved. ‘Cuz here is the next problem You think I wanna deal with the inevitable death of my pencil? Watching it slowly dissolve to a mere shadow of its former self? And be the one bringing it to that point?? With a mechanical pencil there’s this whole dynamic see, you gotta partner in crime to tackle your school work with. He’s with you through every note, worksheet, test, and step of the way and as thanks you keep providing him with more lead to keep that whole dynamic going. With the wood pencil you’ve taken on your little lead companion only for as long as he’s useful to you. Perfectly comfortable with after every test and worksheet he’s completed for you, all of which draining his already limited being, shoving him back into the tool of his torment shredding more and more of his face away to reveal more and more of his precious lead insides until the inevitable moment when you dispose of him and grab a new one to be put through the exact same torture. Now I’m sure there could be something that could be said about those who would take an option like this over the aforementioned one. Not good things by the way if that wasn’t already clear. Bad mean things, probably even some no no words. And even if you wanna pull, “Oh they’re just inanimate objects”. Well see the problem with that is that’s a totally reasonable argument that completely topples the metaphorical house of cards that was my point. (You’re all still monsters though), But that doesn’t change the fact that stopping everything to sharpen your pencil is a total pain in the ass. (I know I already talk Imagine how much time the mechanical pencil saves you overall. According to my calculations, (to see my calculations click here) tell me that over one third of a wooden pencil user's life is spent sharpening pencil. Now that’s a hefty price to pay just to stick to you barbaric, outdated method of writing now isn’t it? But I already touched on that. Let’s just keep rolling with this, like just how annoying it is to write with a normal wooden pencil. You start off with this nice, pointy, perfect beaut of a pencil tip right? So chic, so professional. But 5 minutes of consistent writing later and now you’ve already got yourself a dull, gross looking mess that you wanna just hurry up and sharpen it to get back to that classy bold look. It’s like an addiction or something, like when a dude is constantly ‘roiding out so he looks jacked all the time. You see, the mechanical pencil provides you the same shortcut as steroids, but with none of the consequences. You’re getting a consistent fine point, maintaining that classy, bold, fancy look until you run out of lead. But wait there’s more lady’s and gents. Who could forget just how annoying it is writing with a pencil that’s lived out most of it’s usefulness. You start out with this full, majestic pencil in its prime and then half a week later and you’re trying to finish a worksheet with the Peter Dinklage of writing utensils, (No offense to my boy Dinkles, watching him smack Will Ferrell around in Elf was pretty great. He’s like the highest paid actor of 2017 by the way). I mean seriously. Sure you get that feeling when you hold your pencil out and you’re like, “Awe, my pencil is so cute and tiny!”. Well babies are cute and tiny but have you ever tried to get a baby to do anything for you? No. Why? Because it's infuriating. All you’re gonna get is blank stares and if you’re lucky maybe you’ll get to watch snot slowly run down to its mouth. But that’s fine because you shouldn’t try and get a baby to do stuff for you! And you shouldn’t be trying to use a pencil the size of a tic tac to write! But wooden pencils force you into this scenario! You know what problem you’ve gotta deal with when you use a mechanical pencil? It might make too loud of a clicking sound as it solves BOTH of the problems I just mentioned earlier! *CLICK, oh hey wow, thanks mechanical pencil, I’m glad you’re still supplying the same fine point so that I can continue on my worksheet without needing to waste time sharpening! *CLICK, oh hey wow, thanks mechanical pencil, I’m glad I’m not currently scrunching my fingers into under an inch of space jeopardizing my handwriting artistic flare or even just it being comprehensible! The list goes on and on folks! Sadly, my ambition for continuing this blog and your attention spans do not. So I’ll just wrap it up on this note. Every single one of you knows that mechanical pencils are better and I didn’t even have to pull any “OH THE ENVIRONMENT AND THE TREES! MECHANICAL PENCILS ARE SAVING THE TREES” bull sh*#t to try and convince you. The second I brought up this whole topic I bet a million different reasons flooded to your head on why. So let's just ask ourselves this folks. Why do people still use mechanical pencils? Conclusion… They’re either morons, hipsters that try too hard to be different, or old people that refuse to try anything new because “Bah Humbug” or something like that. But hey, I’m Just Sayin’. (Heh) P.S - Remember when I said I was gonna try and make this short and sweet? Yeah I’m pretty sure this is like my longest one yet. Even though I legitimately believed I could make a short blog post, ‘twas all but a lie... Everyone has their favorite songs right? Yeah of course you do, everyone has some songs they really like or a genre of music they love for one reason or the other. Kinda weird though isn’t it? EVERYONE? I mean what even is it about music that appeals to so many people? Well I think the fact that there isn’t definitive answer to that question is the exact reason. There are so many different variables and methods in how a song may be crafted. Each of these different ways can appeal to so many different people for so many different reasons, and combinations of these methods that can appeal to so many more. I mean let’s be honest, a lot of us aren’t gonna know why in the hell some people enjoy screamo or death metal songs. But then again there are going to be people who throat punch me for talkin’ smack about that beautiful noise. Imagine being the person writing the lyrics for those songs though, (They do have lyrics!) I can’t help but feel bad for the guys. I mean, imagine putting in all that time and effort into some powerful verses, only to listen to the finished product where it all just sounds like by a really angry dude trying to mock the sound of a dying cat while gargling marbles.
I kid the screamo fans out there, I’m sure there’s something special about the genre I don’t see, (please don’t stab me). But that’s my point here, everyone has music they love for reasons personal to them, everyone has a different taste in music personal to them, music is personal. And when you find those songs that just hits all the right notes at all the right times, that’s got a melody that you just get, that’s got a style that you can appreciate. You can just slip away. That’s what I love about it anyways, when I can put my headphones on and not for a second think about what I’ve gotta do or whatever it is I am doing. To me, that’s what I cherish most about music, or just a song in general. Is its ability to take you out. Out of what it is you’re doing, out of your thoughts, out of your problems. And when I say “out” I’m not saying it in a literal sense which I’m sure you were able to pick up on. But what I mean is that you’re no longer perceiving the world around you through your thoughts and your eyes alone. Have you ever heard of the term beer goggles? If you haven’t I’ll let google explain exactly what it is. Now li’l ol’ me being just a minor would know nothing about such a thing first hand so I’m speaking purely off of what I’ve heard. But the parallel I’m making here is that while you’re still seeing out of your eyes and you’re still thinking you’re thoughts. You’re influenced to come to a different conclusion on what you’re seeing. And your thoughts are being influenced down a different path then they would be otherwise. So for example, if you’re walking down the street listening to “Happy”, chances are you aren’t going to start thinking about the grim realities of your minute existence in an infinite galaxy. You know what I’m saying? You’re probably gonna be taking note of the fresh air, the bright sun, and maybe even start walkin’ with some spunk in your step that to you makes sense and looks cool but to the guy walking on the opposite side of the street as you… Well you just look like a mentally challenged chicken. (Don’t worry, I can’t dance either). Or if you’re on a road trip, you’re sitting in the car and “Say Something” or an equally sappy sounding song starts playing. All of the sudden, for some reason your head is resting on your hand and you’re staring out the window at the land passing by like you’re in the damn music video or some dramatic scene in a movie. (Shut up I know you’ve done it). The point I’m making here is that you don’t think about the knitty gritty or any of the details in the world around you because with all this noise bouncing around in your head in the first place you can’t, not in depth at least. You just get caught up in whatever it is the music makes you feel. Yeah I know that’s vague but there’s a lot you get caught up on and there could be a lot of different things that you like about the song that’s makin’ you feel a certain way. I should make known that there are a lot of different ways a person can listen to music and that that definitely has an effect on the general experience. For example listening to music at a party or dance compared to listening to it in headphones. Now there are definitely pros to both but in my opinion, listening to music at a party or something like that I’d be more inclined to calling that hearing music rather than listening. Simply because hearing is the awareness of sound (Definition), while to listen is to pay attention to sound (Definition). And there’s a distinct difference when it comes to music. That’s why when it comes to music I’d definitely prefer to listen to music with headphones or earbuds when the music goes directly into your ear. Because there’s so much to hear and appreciate when it comes to music and often times you can’t hear the whole thing. I’ll end this here before I drag this out. Maybe I’ll make a part two or something ‘cuz even with all that writing I still don’t really think I covered as well as I wanted. Sorry for the novel you got stuck with as a result, (As you can imagine that part of the EQAO tests in public school where you had to summarize the short story really sucked for me). I guess overall I’m just sayin’ that even though music is as normalized as it is, we shouldn’t take for granted how much there is to appreciate about, and there’s a lot. (See what I did there with the title of the blog in the conclusion? Heh… Damn I’m clever) Hey there, it’s your boy Bayley Harris coming to you two weeks since the first blog post was due. And I’ve gotta say… Don’t think I’ve ever procrastinated so hard on any project ever. Well besides those stupid weekly art assignments in grade 7 and 8. Oh God now that I think about it those definitely take the cake, I did like 5 and said to myself, “Yeah… No”, and roughly 30 art homework assignments remained without so much as an attempt by the end of the year. Those sucked though and most grade 7 and 8 kids where in the same boat as me besides the kids who could actually do an art. But this situation is different, doing these blog posts actually appealed to when Mr. Lambert told us that’d be what we’d be doing for a while. There was something about just being able to write down my thoughts and opinions that really got me excited, I guess I just didn’t feel like I was able to talk about a lot of the things I wanted to with my friends, or things my friends just weren’t as interested in as I was and this was my opportunity to just vent about them for anyone who was willing, (or forced to for their mark), to listen.
So that’s what I did, I got right into too. Mr. Lambert saying, “Yeah start your work or whatever” was like a starting gun at a race track. I started thinking for a minute about something I was passionate abo- BAM, “Mainstream media and it’s political biases and other problems n’stuff idk”. I was already off to a bangin’ start with the name and I felt like I knew exactly where I was going with my writing, I was hyped. Got the intro done in a few seconds and was well into the first paragraph before the bell rang. So you may be asking “Bayley, if you were off to such a good start, how did you end up 2 weeks later on a Sunday at 10pm surrounded by empty Werther’s Original caramel wrappers and no blog posts done, desperately trying to piece together a cohesive blog that has no correlation whatsoever with the last two you’ve tried to write about”. Well I’ll answer first with a restraining order demanding you stay 100 ft away from me and searching my house for the cameras or hiding places you must’ve been using to watch me with. I’ll also answer by saying because Werther’s Original caramels are what God was really talking about when he said “Let there be light”. They bring a spiritual light, God handled the whole physical light problem later it was all just mixed up in translation. (FYI that’s why the pope’s inauguration always begins with him eating 20 Werther’s caramels consecutively… if you need some proof well here you go → http://www.catholichappenings.com/pope/chokes/on/inauguration/candy ). Regarding the blog posts, well there could be a number of reasons as to why I’m at where I’m at, many of them self deprecating. But for my own self-esteem I’ll just talk about ones that won’t leave me with an ouchie on my feelings. For one I’ve gotta big problem with procrastination, for some weird reason, funny or interesting YouTube videos or a game or time with friends just happens to be slightly more appealing than school work… My guess is I was dropped on my head as baby or something, would explain a lot more than just that anyways. Finishing all my work, or a majority, last minute doesn’t even seem like a choice anymore. Mr. Lambert showed us a TED talk where the speaker, Tim Urba, elaborates more on the mind of a procrastinator (If you want to watch it click here.) In this talk he touches on what he calls the rational decision maker and the instant gratification monkey, (Oh yeah, we’re talking about the real hard hitting stuff now). Both entities within your head that determine how you go about doing things but with very different characteristics and goals. The rational decision maker seeing the big picture and doing whatever would make sense in the grand scheme of things, so for example planning ahead and finishing that weekly blog post early, while the instant gratification monkey only living in the present and wanting to do whatever is easy and fun, for example watching a YouTube video or playing the same game on your phone a blob fish could do (google blob fish right now, I dare you). Now it would appear that I may have developed a steroid infused, genetically modified, super gratification monkey that has left my rational decision maker in a bloody pulp somewhere in the corner of my mind. Because that monkey has really been holding the reins recently. I started this very blog post at 8:00pm, you wanna know what I’ve done since then? Watched about 20 youtube videos (one of which being and hour, and a number of them around a half hour), eaten like 6 chocolate chip cookies (with milk of course), and I don’t even KNOW how many Werther’s original caramels (Now that I think about it about those would be pretty good with milk too). Yeah it’s 12:24am right now. 1:17am… Just forced myself back from the YouTube video I was watching. Yeah I think I’ve proven my point here. If I were gonna try and delve even deeper into the problems I’m having, (I’m sorry but I gotta make up for some missed work here), I’d have to say that it’s because I’m writing about things that I’m really passionate about, and I wanna talk about it just right. Make sure that I’m perfectly translating my thoughts and opinions into what I’m writing and perfectly reinforcing why I think that it’s right. This causing so much revision and backtracking, nothing feeling juuuuuuuuust right leading me to just kinda leave it for another time when I’m writing on a roll. But somethin just ain’t workin out in those areas. I come in with these great ideas, so sure on what I’m gonna talk about but when I don’t feel like I’m really bringing character or enough information in a paragraph, or I just feel it’s not good enough. There’s no way I’m gonna put out some half baked job on topics like my feelings on political correctness or problems with mainstream media because now this is representative of me and these are things that really resonate with me, so I want to make sure that I’m putting my best foot forward when I talk about them. That why this blog post hasn’t been that hard. Because I’ve just been talking and making jokes. Alright… I think I’ve managed to talk long enough to make up for some lost time here. If there was a point to this whole thing I guess I’d kinda call it an introduction? Unless you pull some silver lining out your ass like, “Hey mate, don’t procrastinate, cuz if you do, you’ll always end up with an empty plate”. It rhymes so it's educational. Introduction though would probably be the most befitting of whatever this was. I think this is gonna be my whole approach to a lot of the things I write about and the more serious stuff will be for special occasions cause I wanna really make sure I get my point across and do a good job on it. Sorry if this has a lot of grammatical errors, it’s 2:31 right now and I've felt the life been slowly drained out of me since 12:00 so surprisingly enough, not quite in the editing mood. I’ll fix it next time though. Chao. |